Opposite Impulses

This summer I have been tracking my finances. I log every cent that flows away from me. I now have several months of data. I spend my money on rent, food and liquor.

This summer I have vowed to take my lunch to work, both the stop the steady stream of money flowing away from me, and to try to curb the 10 - 15 pounds I gain when I come home from the Ice.

This summer I wanted to open my own business and write an HBO series and read books and hike and get more social and get outside more often.

This summer I wanted to stop drinking myself to sleep.

This summer I read a great book. "The Tender Bar" by J.R. Moehringer.

In the epilogue he wrote this:

"I didn't go into a long explanation. I didn't want to list all the reasons that drinking - along with smoking and gambling and most other vices - had lost its appeal after I left Pulicans. I didn't want to tell Jimbo that sobering up had felt like growing up, and vice versa. I didn't want to say that drinking and trying felt like opposite impulses, that when I stopped the one I automatically started the other."

Isn't that interesting?

Like opposite impulses.